Okay so my mind is swirling with a million thoughts I want to share with everyone, anyone on this Monday! Therefore....this journal...blog...thought entry might just be all over the place....so beware!
The discovery of scheduling a posting was quite interesting last night...thus the 8 am posting to see if it really went out when I was writing and researching at midnight last night :)....I know I know I know I should have been asleep but at least I actually respected my need for sleep and didn't get up until 8 am!
I was listening to the podcast of Balanced Bites #102....and I loved the advice given to a post partum woman who was trying to loose her pregnancy weight. How she was being basically too hard on herself. One of the ladies quoted another ladies posting on her blog/site about how she strives to work with her body. And what she eats she makes a conscience decision. Thus eliminating any emotional baggage. If she eats a piece of cake she says: I am going to eat this cake and know that it may make me feel not so great...or I know it has no value but I will enjoy this with my child. But if she thinks she is going to turn to it because of an emotional thought or whatever, then she does not eat it. She doesn't eat or do anything that is going to create guilt or emotional baggage.
I LOVE THAT! Mostly because that is how I strive to live....even more so this last 3 years since I have found my wonderful new lifestyle!
Here is a very real in time example....I enjoyed watching a movie yesterday with my wonderful daughter. She wanted popcorn....I love popcorn. I have wonderful organic popcorn that I can pop for her fresh and put coconut oil on it...sea salt...and she loves it that way! BUT it is a grain....I made a conscience decision that I would eat some of it with her....
Did I pay for it? Oh yes...I within 30-45 minutes felt the gas swell my belly....it hurt soooo bad.....and today my knees are swollen and really really really hurt....but I don't do it often....was it worth it? Yes and No! Worth knowing that my daughter felt joy and fellowship...no cause I hurt.....but I also know I will get it out of my system with patience.....BUT it did actually encourage me to search for other Paleo's who may have some alternative suggestions for popcorn lovers! (This is probably the only grain that I really love and miss!)
I found some really fun recipe ideas with cauliflower....you must do a pintrest search!
I love homeschooling....I love unschooling....I love Charlotte Mason....I love the phases and ideas and concepts behind the Classical style of education....I LOVE LEARNING with my daughter!
We had such a wonderful day of learning! It got me to thinking....why do we think everything has to be separating? Subjects? Life? It is so funny because it is probably why I lean more toward Charlotte Mason and Unschooling styles because I don't see Math as just 1+1=2.....I see: if you buy this for this amount and that for that amount then you spend xyz....and that leaves you with "abc" from your budget....where do we want to put the remainder? In this fund, that savings, this toy...??? Or what about how did this historical event relate to our faith time line, and how about lets write this bible scripture to then edit...critique and work on our Language Arts!
It all is related....it all works together rather than separate!
Which brings me to...
Why I think it is impossible to separate our FAITH...FOOD...FITNESS....AND EVEN OUR FINANCES...OH AND WHAT ABOUT FUN....oh yeah and FAMILY!!!
It's impossible....because each affect (yes affect...influence) each other....
I love how if I am truly thinking about what God would want me to do than I am going to take care of my body physically and mentally....and that means not going to any extremes. I will not be lazy with it and allow it to become unhealthy....but on the flip I will not become so obsessive and legalistic that I strive for vanity and appearance....which then in turn becomes about our finances....in how much are we willing to spend to make sure we are healthy (with balance) and thus turning to real food....not quick fixes....or processed gunk!
I LOVE WHERE I AM AT IN LIFE!
I have such an interesting life story....mine isn't necessarily any more special or scary or sad or horrific than the next person. But it is mine. Some of it is worse than someone else's and better than another persons. BUT it is my story....and it is what formed me....it is how I am who I am today....AND I LOVE IT!
I love being able to see God do amazing things in my life and not get frustrated or angry at Him because of the bumps, challenges, learning lessons!
In the last 3 years I have challenged myself in more ways than I have ever in the past...and even had myself be my own lab rat to see how some things may react in my body and with my mind.
From how can IF (intermittent fasting) fit in with my paleo lifestyle... and to what extent....to supplementation....thus leading me to learn even more about quality of supplements....to if I even need supplements...to training a specific way to see if I can achieve a certain goal...to restricting calories and how does it make me feel....to losing and/or gaining 5 -10 lbs to see how it may or may not affect my run, my sleep, my mental health....
Which has all lead me to....
I love myself!
I love exactly where I am in life! I love being healthy. I love being aware and making conscience decisions about my entire health: mind, body and soul! I love knowing that I am okay with being Paleo...not eating bread, sugar, dairy, gunk....and drinking a glass of wine most nights the week!
I am way ok with having some softness around my hips and legs...I am okay with the wonderful laugh lines between my eyes and around my lips.
I am okay with not worrying about what is suppose to happen next week or even tomorrow.
I am okay with if someone wants to be angry or upset or even frustrated with me.
I was listening to a podcast (again from BalancedBites...hehe...and from Paleo Lifestyle and Fitness)...and I love how they encourage people (especially women) to love themselves! To quit critiquing those little minuscule flaws that no one else sees! To not be afraid of having some body fat....to not be afraid of having curves...to not be afraid of food....real food! To not put your adrenal glands through the ringer....and to possibly evaluate if you are under eating!
This topic is so dear to me because I see it over and over....throughout the years....
Even at my heaviest with all my health issues I actually really loved myself during that time in my life! I knew I was a child of God...I knew I probably needed to figure some things out with my health but I knew I was active....and taking care of myself to the best of my ability at that time. And I have learned so much.....
So no matter what I may be going through in life....whether it is challenging myself physically, mentally, spiritually I know God loves me thus I MUST LOVE MYSELF!
This brings me to my final random thought....
I have enjoyed the discipline of not allowing myself to get on FB during the week last week other than Sunday because I accomplished soo sooo much more in the morning than I probably ever have....
It is so easy to justify that I am posting on one of my private groups...I am helping spread good ripples...plant seeds....learn from others....be informed...stay in touch.....
But it can easily become one of those habits that you think your must post and share cause otherwise how are they going to know....or....what if I don't read that one post then I won't know....or that person will be mad at me if I am not on FB checking to see what they said or sent me.....
Have I missed being on FB? YES AND NO! I love the discipline of saying I'm not going there today....but I miss when I have an idea I want to share that I have to keep it to myself....but maybe that is the point?! Maybe not every thought we have is meant to be broadcast-ed.
SOOO....what is a girl to do who really actually is an introvert at heart....but feels God calling her to share things....to be open...honest...vulnerable....in hopes of helping others who may feel like they are the only one feeling what they are feeling or someone who really needs to hear or know something!?
BALANCE!!! That is what it is all about! BALANCE!!!